{"id":1705,"date":"2018-01-19T09:19:30","date_gmt":"2018-01-19T09:19:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/?p=1705"},"modified":"2018-01-19T09:19:30","modified_gmt":"2018-01-19T09:19:30","slug":"i-am-not-a-god","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/2018\/01\/19\/i-am-not-a-god\/","title":{"rendered":"I am not a god"},"content":{"rendered":"

Well, that didn\u2019t last. Previously\u2026 a week ago I was the hottest and the coolest man around<\/a>. Okay, so that took some pretty unlikely coincidences and it took your turning a blind eye to some obvious facts, but otherwise it was true and I basked.<\/p>\n

This week I was mistaken for Damien Green, the disgraced Tory politician. Wait. I mean a disgraced Tory politician. I’ve lost track of how many of those there are.<\/p>\n

Anyway, it was only for a moment but I continue to shudder. <\/p>\n

Still, if I had a point last week, I thought it was that there is a place for each of us. There in the Canary Islands I meant it physically or geophysically but also very much in writing. I have been in situations where my writing was the worst and others where it was the best. I\u2019m not convinced I\u2019ve got that range so I put it down to the places.<\/p>\n

Clearly, then, you need to find the right place for you.<\/p>\n

But my brief mistaken identity made me realise that it\u2019s not that simple. For you\u2019d think I should run away from the party where this mistake happened and you\u2019d think I should run back to the Canary Islands.<\/p>\n

Only, after I spoke to you last week, I caught a cold in the Canaries \u2013 I don\u2019t know why that suddenly sounds rude \u2013 and my final memory of the place is of shivering in hot weather next to a pool which in my delirium may or may not have had a fashion show form around me.<\/p>\n

And the party where I gasped aloud was superb. It was the Writers\u2019 Guild Awards night and, hand on heart, I haven\u2019t had such a good evening in years. Easily the best awards I\u2019ve been to, absolutely the most interesting room full of happy writers, I had a blast.<\/p>\n

And a shudder. But chiefly a blast.<\/p>\n

So if I can hang on to any possible semblance of a point, it might be this. Yes, there are places we fit in and they are fantastic. But I urgently need cosmetic surgery.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Well, that didn\u2019t last. Previously\u2026 a week ago I was the hottest and the coolest man around. Okay, so that … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[178],"tags":[1198,1244,1245,1246,1239,1241,1182,1243,1242,1248,1247,1240,363],"class_list":["post-1705","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-selfdistract","tag-awards","tag-canaries","tag-canary-island","tag-cold","tag-damien-green","tag-disgraced","tag-flu","tag-identity","tag-mistaken","tag-party","tag-temperature","tag-tory","tag-writers-guild"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4chyI-rv","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1705","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1705"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1705\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1706,"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1705\/revisions\/1706"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1705"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1705"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/williamgallagher.com\/selfdistract\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1705"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}